Books 6 and 7

Book 6:  As You Wish by Cary Elwes and  Joe Layden

The making of The Princess Bride is detailed by Elwes with some backup from Layden.  There are also sidebar commentaries by the other actors, the writer and director.  Who doesn't love this movie?  People who are DEAD INSIDE.  I have seen it probably a dozen times and I would see it another dozen more.  Everyone involved in this book describes it as magical-- a great script, a great setting, a great director, and a great ensemble.  Elwes is totally charming, grateful and endearing from start to finish.

Book 7:  Say Yes to the Marquess by Tessa Dare

This is the second in Dare's Castles Ever After Series.  I enjoyed it mostly, but there was no exposition of how the heroine came to inherit her castle. Supposedly she inherited it from the same dead guy as in the previous installment, but there was no connection made.  It just seemed an odd omission. On the plus side, you could read these out of order without a problem. The hero was a little bit of an alphahole for my taste,  I didn't really care for the secondary characters.

Two Berets

I refuse to use Picassa So Google Can Suck It  You will have to click for a picture.  I tried to open up rights entirely on the picture but flickr and blogger just don't play nice.

I made these berets, one for a 12 yr old girl, one for her American Girl Doll, from Berocco Comfort DK Print. I tend to wing it on hats a lot and use the kind of yarn that does the talking instead of a pattern.  I consider my hat method more of a recipe than a pattern since you are adjusting as you go.

This is how I do a beret/tam.  I guess the number of stitches to cast on from my Ann Budd book or free patterns on ravelry.  Then I knit a short 2x2 ribbed brim, An inch for the doll, 1.5 inches for the girl.  To increase I do a round of kfb, with a couple of  spread out kfbf  (if I need to) to get the total number of stitches to a multiple of 10.  I knit an inch and a half before decreases on the doll hat, I think 3 on the girl's hat.  At that point, I do 5 paired decreases, evenly spaced, every other row. Use stitch markers and you can't go wrong.  I use a K2tog on one side of the marker and a Knit_Return_Pass (that is my left leaning decrease since I am a mirror knitting lefty).  At 10 stitches remaining, I do a  round of k2tog all around then I turn the hat inside out and thread the tail through the stitches from the inside and pull to close.  If you pull too tight, you get a hat nipple, at that point, you either need to loosen it up or make a pompom.  I hate making pompoms, so I am pretty careful not to make a hat nipple.

Book 5

Book 5:  Daring Miss Danvers by Vivienne Lorret

I read this book in a little over a day of reading.  It clocks in at 212 pages on the nook.  I have to say, I rushed a little hoping there would be either some heat between the two characters or at least some sort of conflict that would make the HAE (happily ever after, for the n00bs) a little more rewarding. Ultimately, it was just a meh for me.   I don't think I will read the others in the series.

Books 3 and 4

Book 3:  The Burglar Who Painted Like Mondrian by Lawrence Block.

Bernie Rhodenbarr is at it again-- breaking, entering and neglecting to get a good alibi for the murder that is pinned on him.  So many twists as Bernie steals some stamps but is framed for murdering a tenant in the same building, who had paid ole Bern to appraise his book collection.  And worse yet, Carolyn (Bernie's BFF) gets a call that her cat is being held ransom for a rare, expensive painting by Mondrian.  Naturally, Bernie manages to clear his name, but it's a close call.

Book 4:  The Burglar Who Traded Ted Williams by Lawrence Block

This installment was published 11 years after Mondrian.  Bernie is still knocking about with his used bookstore and he and Carolyn are still BFFs.  In this adventure, Bernie is framed for the theft of some baseball cards, he finds a corpse in a locked room, and he has a dispute with his landlord.  It's all quite convoluted.  Ultimately, I found the end of this one less than spectacular from a justice standpoint.  I did like how the landlord storyline worked out though.

Books 1 and 2

Book 1:  Another Man's Moccasins by Craig Johnson

This is probably my favorite of the Longmire books so far, though book 2 was pretty  close.  When a young Vietnamese woman is found dead near the squatters camp of homeless, mentally ill veteran of the Vietnam war it stirs up the past for Walt.  While he works this case, he recalls his first case as an MP in Vietnam.  I will say that with this book it was apparent to me that the series does need to be read in order.  I found the ending to be a bigger surprise for me than it was for Walt.  Some mystery writers are good enough to tell a story without it being a surprise or a twist and Craig Johnson is one of those writers.


Book 2:  Sweet Disorder by Rose Lerner

I really liked In For A Penny by the same author.  This book left me a bit soured though.  The supporting characters were all unlikeable and the resolution of the story of the heroine's sister's problems was too easy and not very plausible.

2014 Knitting Summary

Well, I finished 14 objects last year.  7 of those were hats.  There were also 2 pair of socks, a shawl, a cape, a scarf and three blankets for cats (at the NE Humane Society).  All in all, I was a little disappointed in my own output.  If you compare the yardage I bought with the yardage I knit, I look like a doomsday prepper of yarn.  If you compare by weight, I knitted 2.1 Kg and purchased 2.5 kg, which is less bordering on mental illness.

I was most pleased with the socks I made.  They are nice and cozy and they are wearing well.

2014 Reading Round Up

I totally fucked around during 2014 in terms of book updates.  I also blew off the entire idea of blogging about knitting.

My brother managed to read and review 11 books, just one shy of his goal.  It made me go a little easier on myself regarding my assumed failure to read 52 books in 52 weeks.  

So based on what I both bought and archived in my nook this year and  those that I ranked at the library, here is a record of books that I read for the first time 2014:

Girl With The Cat Tattoo by Theresa Weir

Geek With The Cat Tatto by Theresa Weir

A Gentleman Never Tells by Juliana Gray

Romancing the Duke by Tessa Ware

Bedding Lord Ned by Sally MacKenzie

Surprising Lord Jack by Sally MacKenzie

Wild Things by Chloe Neill

Tangled Threads by Jennifer Estep
Cat Daddy By Jackson Galaxy
A Girl Walks Into A Bar by Rachel Dratch
Lawfully Wedded Husband by Joel Derfner
A Duke Never Yields by Juliana Gray
Fool Me Twice by Meredith Duran
Stephen Colbert: Beyond Truthiness by Bruce Watson
That Scandalous Summer by Meredith Duran
Written on your Skin by Meredith Duran
Waiting On You by Kristan Higgins
Wallflower Gone Wild by Maya Rodale
Stone Fox by Greg Hargreaves
Nightshifted by Cassie Alexander
Lady Mercy Danforthe Flirts With Scandal by Jayne Fresina
Little Night Mischief by Emily Greenwood
Three Weeks with Lady X by Eloisa James
The Bedwetter by Sarah Silverman
Loving Lord Ash by Sally MacKenzie
The Sum of All Kisses by Julia Quinn
Rude Bitches Make Me Tired by Celia Rivenbark
The Ugly Duckling by Eloisa James
Orange Is the New Black by Piper Kerman
The Amazing Thing About the Way it Goes by Stephanie Pearl-McPhee
The Enemy by Charles Higson
THe Shambling Guide to New York City by Mur Lafferty
Moonshifted by Cassie Alexander
A Long Way Home by Saroo Brierly
The Escape by Mary Balogh
The Suffragette Scandal by Courtney Milan
Blood Games by Chloe Neill
I'm the Vampire, That's Why by Michele Bardsley
No Good Earl Goes Unpunished by Sarah MacLean
One Good Earl Deserves a Lover by Sarah MacLean
Don't Make Me Think, Revisited by Steve Krug
Touch of Frost by Jennifer Estep
Kiss of Frost by Jennifer Estep
Dark Frost by Jennifer Estep
Burglars Can't Be Choosers by Lawrence Block
What A Wallflower Wants by Maya Rodale
In Your Dreams by Kristan Higgans
The Burglar In The Closet by Lawrence Block
The Burglar Who Loved to Quote Kipling by Lawrence Block
How to Catch a Wild Viscount by Tessa Dare
Eight Keys by Suzanne LaFleur
The Burglar Who Studied Spinoza by Lawrence Block
How to Lose a Duke in Ten Days by Laura Lee Guhrke
A Death Without Company by Craig Johnson
Never Judge A Lady By Her Cover by Sarah MacLean
Kindness Goes Unpunished by Craig Johnson

FIFTY SIX! Yeah, bitches!

I am not going to count the 3 I can think of this year that I reread and I seem to have locked myself out of my amazon acct, so I can't tell what I read on the kindle app.  I may be just over 60 books for the year.

Finished Item TWO!

Unfortunately, the evil empire of Google no longer allows me to link photos from the evil empire of Yahoo.  You'd think they'd form some sort of unholy alliance.

Chouette  The pattern had a chart and written instructions.  I would like to say this made me an adept chart reader but that would be a big fat lie.  Charts confuse me.  You would think they wouldn’t, since I knit left to right, as I read. I really struggled to reverse the topmost cable which made the horns of the owl.  There was a significant amount of frogging and swearing and do-over.  I think however, that I learned enough about cables for this to be of benefit in my next cabling project.  

A friend of mine had a rough year last year and shortly before Christmas/Solstice she put up a picture of Chouette on facebook and said facetiously “Who wants to knit this for me?”  Well, I DO!  I had never knitted cables before, and this is the classic owl cable so it seemed like a good starter cable. (SNORTY SNORT SNORT).  

There were some keystone kop-like antics in making this.  My kid spilled macaroni on the first skein of yarn.  Luckily I bought 2 because I thought 1 was pushing it with the yardage listed on the pattern. The yarn I used is Brown Sheep Lamb’s Pride Bulky.  I’m not usually a fan of single plies because so often they pill if you raise an eyebrow at them.  This yarn, though, gave me a problem I had not encountered before.  As I cast it on, it unspun and broke. TWICE!  I ended up pausing  several times in the final cast on attempt in order to respin it against my leg.  I don’t know if this is peculiar to this yarn or peculiar to lefties knitting this yarn or if it is because I am a lefty mirrored knitter.  The yarn also sheds like crazy.  Fuzz everywhere.  Do not knit beige yarn in dark clothes!  I will say though that I don’t find this a scratchy yarn and I think once it has a little soak with some hair conditioner that it will be soft enough for anyone to wear next to skin.  I hope it is anyhow, or I will have to instruct the recipient to line it or mail it back to me for lining. 

I knitted this on 2 shorter circulars as I am not a fan of either DPNs or Magic Loop for hats.  Since the yarn is a wholesome oatmeal color, I used my Harmonies for ultimate contrast between yarn and needles.  I highly recommend that to others with powerfully corrected vision.  

Week 3, Book 3: Fat Vampire 4: Harder Better Fatter Stronger

This is not a stand alone book. There is really no way to review the 4th book without spoiling the hell out of the first three, should you want to read them.  You should want to read them, strictly for entertainment purposes.  This is not enriching literature.  That is probably why the first 4 are sold as a Value Meal package of ebooks.

Reginald is a fatty.  Not chubby, not hollywood fat, but real fat.  He's 350 lbs. He's a comfort eating loner who is the recipient of workplace bullying.  Usually, anti-heroes are morally nebulous.  Reginald is an anti-hero in all the external ways.  He is turned in book 1 after being brutally attacked by some douchebag vamps.  Think of every mean, popular, dim asshole who picked on dweebs in high school.  It was a lot like that.  So a less cool, but much older stronger vampire, Maurice, turns Reginald because otherwise, he'd die. This turns out to be a tipping point in the vampire world as you don't let the fatty sit at the cool kids' table in the cafeteria.  You just don't!

Since ole Reg isn't going to become superstrong or fast he ends up becoming super smart-- his usual braininess ends up getting amped up to excellent strategizing,  pushing the limits of glamouring, and a little mindmelding.  Reg can't seem to give up his human weakness for stress eating, which can be somewhat offputting, even for me, a champ at eating feelings.  He wears his low self esteem on his 4XL sleeve.  That is, to me, more offputting than the extreme eating descriptions. Reg, despite his unattractive physique and whining manages to get a superhot girlfriend.  Ah, male authors and wish fulfillment!  I found Reg's girlfriend, Nikki, to be sort of boring and flat.  Claire, a young girl Reg becomes friends with because he can't bear to eat her, is much more interesting.

The first 4 books are really about the descent into chaos and revolution in the vampire world, with a little run in with pissed of angels in the mix.  Each book ends at a pretty dramatic cliffhanger.  So the first half of each book is fixing a shitstorm and the second half is the gathering of clouds for a new shitstorm.

Week 2, Book 2: Girl Walks Into a Bar by Rachel Dratch

I really enjoyed this book.  The first half was kind of rough, what with the struggles of show biz and the cavalcade of losers that Rachel meets in her quest for love.  I found the discussion of improv comedy training and the processes of SNL pretty interesting.  The grinding shallowness regarding how women are 'allowed' to look in our entertainment is pretty much as I expected, but still a soul sucking bummer.  I very much identified with the midlife semi crisis that Rachel found herself in, although, no one gives a shit how I look at work as long as I come to work with all my clothes.

Then! When least expected, Rachel finds herself pregnant by a guy who she hasn't been with all that long and they forge a coparenting arrangement independent of their relationship.  I don't know if they are still together, I suppose if I wasn't lazy as crap I would check wikipedia. It's just an amazingly grownup thing to do, to put your kid ahead of  your id.  What a goddamn shame everyone doesn't do that. 

There are some laugh-out-loud discussions of pregnancy and that first bit of time after the baby is out when your whole life is a series of whatthefuck and I'msofakingtired.  That's the fourth trimester there and it's exhausting.  

First Finished Object

At one time, I was able to write a blog post from a flickr link. . .now flickr links are not accepted for photos by blogger.  Here is a photo.  I semi-improvised this cape for my 5 year old niece.  I started with a pattern for a top down raglan cardigan and fiddled around till I got a gauge I liked.  The yarn is Regia Vulcano 6 ply. It's a nice superwash/nylon blend in sports weight and best of all, it comes in a 150 g put up.

I ended up using a size 6 US needle.  The needle was my brand new Caspian from knit picks.  It is just as nice as their other needles, a different color is all.  Now, I love my original Harmonies, but I knit a lot of purple stuff.  I got some Symphonies when they first came out and the sizing was inconsistent, but still, mostly good interchangeable needles for the price.  So as it stands, I have 2 complete sets of Harmonies, one of Symphony and one of Caspians.  I would rather knit with shitty yarn than shitty needles.

So, I cast on 36,  I knitted 6 rows for the collar and then the rest is stockinette with a 4 stitch garter band on either side.  I did the raglan increases until it looked approximately like where the stitches would go onto holders to be used for sleeves later.  I didn't put the stitches onto holders, instead I put a few more increase rows in and then I knit straight down until the amount of yarn I had looked like approximately 1/3 of the yarn.  I got out my trusty kitchen scale and weighed the ball, then I knitted 10 rows and weighed it again and I determined that each row used 2 grams of yarn.  I knew I wanted to do a feather and fan border, four repeats of four rows each plus a row to cast off and a smallish amount of yarn for an i-cord button loop, so I knew to start the border at 35 grams of yarn.  I ended up casting off 1 row early so that I did just the one row after the eyelets.   I picked up stitches on the back of the border to graft in the i-cord loop for the button.  I fitted it as I went along.  The button is just a pink flower button I found at walmart.

This yarn was very prone to blooming when wet, though I am pleased to report the color was mostly fast, just a tiny tinge to the soaking water.  It could have blocked even larger, but my niece is pretty shrimpy, like the rest of the family.  The feather and fan opened up really nicely and the shape held without any pins at all. Instead of a fancy blocking mat, I used a floor mat from harbor freight.

Week 1, Book 1 The Geek With the Cat Tattoo

I sat down this morning because the most orderly way to read 52 books in 52 weeks is to check in weekly with a freshly finished book.  Instead of having a book to write about with my coffee I realized that I am a total spaz.  It's either hyper focus or no focus at all with me.  At 7 am, I hadn’t finished a book during the first 7 days of the year because I have SEVEN books in progress.  I am reading a contemporary romance, a historical romance, a paranormal non-romance, a contemporary mystery, a horror novel, a memoir and a religious book.

I haven’t finished a knitting project in the first 7 days of the year because I have SEVEN things in progress!  I am knitting a cape (for my niece), a hat for a friend, a scarf for gifting, 2 shawls for myself, a pair of socks for myself and a pair of slippers for myself.  The slippers are about my 4^th start at slippers.  I keep not liking the patterns I pick, so the slippers should count as seven projects on their own, as many times as I’ve started them and ripped it all out.

Clearly, I need to get my shit together and finish some stuff. I sat down to read at lunch and whipped out the last 70 pages or so of The Geek With the Cat Tattoo by Theresa Weir.  I bought this because it was a $0.99 book on kindle and I'd enjoyed the first book in the series.  TGWTCT is the print equivalent of 162 pages.  For comparison, The Shining is 466 pages.  (It's also the horror book I'm reading). 

The first book in the series is a contemporary romance with a little suspense action thrown in.   I was disappointed that this one was not a suspense hybrid.  The Geek of the title is Emerson, who builds and repairs guitars, and is afraid to talk to girls like Lola, who's a free spirit musician with a recent bad boyfriend experience.  The Cat, is a magical cat, named Sam, who has the ability sort of mentally push humans around.  JUST LIKE EVERY OTHER CAT.  EVER.  

I found a lot of the conflict manufactured in this, what with Lola not being bright enough to figure out if Emerson was shy or just a jerk, and Emerson being all insecure and shy. There was a significant amount of navel gazing by the characters.  It's also always weird to me in a book when characters care what their siblings think of their boyfriends.  Do adults do that?  I never cared. Anyhow, I think it's probably a lot harder to plot a romance in a novella than in a full length novel, and it showed in this book.  I would probably give it a C- if it was more expensive, but at the current bargain price, it was a C.

I read it on the kindle app on my phone or on my nook HD+ tablet.  I don't care for the weird way that Kindle tracks your progress by percentage.  However, I do find it pretty crazy the way it tracks your reading speed and then tells you how much longer you have to read the book.  It's pretty gratifying for people who read fast. 

Don't Call It a Comeback!

I've decided to resume my musings, you know, for both of my fans.  I found it difficult to keep up with what I've read when I don't have a good central place to track it.  Did I read 52 books in 52 weeks?  NO IDEA!

What did I knit?  4 shawls for my aunts, a pair of  ankle socks for Chuck, 5 baby hats for donation and 2 scarves.  I have too many things in progress, one hat for a friend, one cape for my niece, 2 shawls for myself, a pair of socks for myself and a cardigan for myself.  I also have gathered materials and patterns for a couple of large afghans that I am just crazy enough to make in non-superwash wool. What?  I have a bathtub.

Primarily I shut this down due to having a lot going on.  2013 kind of  sucked. Disclosing only what is  mine to disclose,  there were three hospital stays, a couple of PIC lines, a sigmoid colon removal, an age related hearing loss diagnosis, 2 dead cats, and no luck on our house hunting this year.

Right now I am collecting new year's rituals for good luck.

roach jars: knitter's edition

roach jars: knitter's edition, originally uploaded by fudh4x0r.

So, I've been saving all these nubbins of yarn and putting them in the jar in the middle for the last year. Yesterday, I found a whole ziplock of other remnants in my stash and put them into other jars. These are quart jars, by the by. Each of these represents a finished object and I feel pretty proud of myself each time I look at them. I keep these on my desk at home.

Clockwork!

section, originally uploaded by fudh4x0r.

Here is my finished Clockwork, spread out on the king sized bed. I didn't wet or steam block it because I'm still scarred by the sadness of my last project.

This is knitted of 4 balls of KnitPicks City Tweed dk in Romance and 5 in Orca. I made 3 slightly smaller sections. This thing is snugglier than you can imagine. I will not be cold at work this winter! Take that crappy HVAC!

See what I mean?

Untitled, originally uploaded by fudh4x0r.

Here you can see the nugget of yarn leftover on top of the baktus. There is quite a contrast in the brightness of the yarn vs the product that apparently CAN'T EVER GET WET! I didn't even impulsively wear it before blocking so this never got out and about before it turned to muddy pale green crap. BOO.

Disappointment and Improvisation

Once the baktus was finished, I put it in the sink to soak and the colors ran into a muddled horrible mess. I pulled it out and squeezed it before too much ran out and blocked it on the ironing board, folded in half. I tried resoaking it with a color catching sheet and it didn't help.  I tried putting it in the washer on delicate with the color catching sheet and it looks WORSE. The colors ran more and the yarn fuzzed out like a 14 yr old boy.  All that work and the yarn just looks like total shit.  I am considering an overdye of blue to make it a blue and green affair, but I am still pissed off that the dyer didn't set the dye properly and the washing instructions were a wicked lie.

I cast on the Bold and Bulky Mini Cardi using the recommended yarn in dark gray.  I started it intending only to modify it by making it longer, and giving it long sleeves instead of 3/4 length. That plan has gone quite out the window.  I've gone up from a 13 to a 17 in needle size.  I've twisted the yarn overs when knitting them to eliminate the holes.  I added 2 short rows to the back since it was riding up a bit.  I have 5 skeins of the dark gray, and 2 skeins of light gray for the contrast trim.  I'm an overbuyer of yarn.  I believe I will make the entire sweater in the dark gray and use the light gray for some easy Christmas gifts or something.  I am pretty sureI will have at least 1 extra skein of the dark gray as well.  The pattern is easy-peasy to follow.  It would be an excellent sweater for a first time sweater knitter.  The only sweaters I've made before are the cruelly misnamed Five Hour Baby Sweater and the incredibly clever Baby Surprise Jacket. 

Baktus Variation

IMAG0719, originally uploaded by fudh4x0r.

I knitted this baktus with a lattice edging. I put it aside for the Ravellenic games. I need to block it yet and I think I will string block it. I'd like to get a little more depth out of it. There was a lot of pooling in the yarn, Knit It Up: Squishy. Hey, that is the price you pay with hand paint. I will say that I found the base yarn a bit splitty. Blue shoes and happiness is the color name. I may not keep this one. I have a couple of aunts who want shawls and this seems like a good one to give up.

My Ravellenic Medal Podium

IMAG0718.jpg, originally uploaded by fudh4x0r.

The Cowl is a simple seed stitch border, some stripes with slipped stitches, and then another seed stitch border. I made it for Chas. The yarn is Red Heart Soft.

The WIP Wrestling is Byron the Clubfoot Sheep. He was knitted in fourteen pieces that then had to be sewn up together. Did I mention I hate sewing up? I knitted 7 feet in order to produce 2 pairs that matched. There was no way I could have knitted 4 that matched. The yarns are Hobby Lobby's Bamboo Spun for the wooly parts and Bernat Cotton Tots for his head and extremities.

The Scarf Hockey has a 6 stitch cast on, twisted loop bottom in lieu of fringe, knit all the even rows, expand to 20 stitches by adding 1 stitch on each side on every odd row. Then GARTER GARTER GARTER until it's time to reduce down to 6, do the twisted loops, and cast off. The yarn is the remainder of the bamboo spun from Byron plus another skein I bought at the same time because I thought I might want to make a bunch of sheep. HAR.

All in all, I am quite pleased with the amount of knitting I did during Those Games That Don't Want Us To Associate With Them. I am having some neck pain on the left and elbow pain on the right. We won't even start on how sore my eyes are.

I think my favorite part of the Olympics is seeing countries recently or not so recently liberated, where the athletes may now truly sing their own anthems.

Seeing the moms hug their winners gets me every time as well.

In Mom News at my house, my baby turned EIGHT today. My mind, she is blown. The day he was born, he turned at the last minute, to an unfavorable position, leading to an emergency c-section. There was a hurricane Charley on the news. Life has been like that since then. This kid, my Charlie, continues to amaze me with his curiosity, his humor, his volcanic temper, his foul feet, his amazing energy and his big, loving heart.

Not that kind of shrub

IMAG0633.jpg, originally uploaded by fudh4x0r.

I just strained my first batch of shrub. (A colonial era method for preserving fruit where you steep it with vinegar and sugar and drink it later mixed with water and possibly a little hooch.)

I made it with a bag of frozen mixed berries, 3/4 cup turbinado sugar, and 1 1/2 cups vinegar. I basically chucked it in the fridge, giving it a little shake now and again over the course of 3 weeks. I am having 4T in a pint of club soda. It's delicious.