Friday, February 27, 2009

Monday, February 23, 2009

5th Book: Coraline

I've seen the movie twice now, in 3-D and I just really love it. It's magical and creepy and beautiful. Also? TINY HAND KNITTED STUFF. OMG!! SQWEEEEE!!!! TEH AWESOME!!!!!!1@!! It has a couple of great songs. The voicing is well done.

I also read the graphic novel alongside the actual book. So there is my 5th book. I never read anything by Neil Gaimon before and I'm not sure why. Really, how foolish of me!

Last night I swatched up my sample for the February Lady Sweater. I get just 1/5 more stitch per inch than suggested. If I change to a different sized needle then I'll just have fewer stitches per inch.

I plan to work on the 3 most popular patterns of the web-- Calorimetry, FLS, and the Clapotis. Which I call The Clap, because I'm a dirty, dirty girl.

I found my missing FO. Then I took pictures. Then Charlie took my camera to take pictures of his Thomas the Tank Engine O Scale train. I can't find it! HE HAS CAUSED CONFUSION AND DELAY!

In kiddie literature, I must recommend Goodnight Goon for those sick of Goodnight Moon.

Sunday, February 15, 2009

I R DUM

Say you want to knit a dishcloth with a whale on it. Say you download some knitting graph paper (and yes, it has to be special for knitting because the stitches are not square, but vertical rectangles). Then you create your chart so you can make the background stockinette and the whale reverse stockinette. After this you write down the instructions for each row. And you cast on and kick it into gear. Well, if you are a moron, like me, you will notice after a few inches, that things just don't look right. And if you are a tool, like me, you will throw (or pick) good yarn after bad and keep on keepin' on with some kind of faith that the piece will improve. Only after a bigass glass of pinot grigio will you realize that U R DUM.

Those directions? They ignore the fact that at the end of each odd row, you turn the work and make the even rows on the wrong side. So each even row should follow the chart RIGHT TO LEFT. NOT LEFT TO RIGHT.

I R DUM

I R FROG'N.

Saturday, February 14, 2009

4th Book: Bad Jobs

The Fourth Book is Bad Jobs, a collection of essays, poems, and cartoons about work written in 1998. There was a window, between when I graduated from KU and when the internet exploded to life when people were finishing college and then going on to McJobs.

I had some bad jobs in those days as well-- phone centers, temping, retail. Still, I don't think I was such a. . . douche. Oh the baggery of these folks. I am tempted to google their asses and see if they are still failures. Even when I hated my jobs with every fiber of my being I was not about to steal from my employer or create a health hazard (note: don't get crushed ice at the store, ever) or get high at work. What a waste of weed! They are all angry that they didn't leave college and get fantastic jobs, but you have to wonder if they were functional enough to get through the interview process for a fantastic job.

I am way, way behind in the 52 books in 52 Weeks Challenge. Sigh.

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Misery

Misery loves company, or peanut butter. At work, I have no company. And now peanut butter could kill you. My team of 5 was cut to 2 people. The other survivor sits on the other side of a 'wall'. And by wall I mean, fabric, hollow core, less than 6 ft high, but taller than I am, beige or maybe gray. Who can tell?

Every week I have the honor of logging my time in 15 minute increments. I decided to log as Department Administration what was "Time Crying In Bathroom".

One of my coworkers didn't answer the email I sent him and it makes me sad. I know! WHINER. I am complaining about my feeeeeeeeeeeeeelings and he doesn't have a job. Still I am a pack animal and I have no pack. I am not really a lone wolf type. My other former coworker is the kind of guy who knows God Has A Plan. Hey good for him, but I believe in Free Will and that sometimes The Plan Sucks. (I believe those with the faith of a child call it Being Tested.) So the Faithful One has called and I think he is out there knocking on doors. He is an excellent networker and not afraid to ask for help from his extended support circle when warranted.

A number of other great people not on my team were let go. I can't help but wondering if I am the new cabin boy on the Ship of Fools.

The other survivors are kind of babying me, which is sweet. I didn't expect that of the geeks.

In other Misery News, I fell on the ice whilst walking Barkimedes and quite likely have whiplash. Just enough pain not to be killed by ibuprofen, not enough for vicodin at work. I am trying to resist the urge to go back and yell at the homeowner, but I should probably leave them a note, because if it had been a postal worker or a little old lady who fell, they'd be in for a world of legal pain.

It's hard to concentrate on books. I have picked up and discarded several, which is not like me. So I've been working on reading a book comprised of the letters between HL Mencken and his wife, Sara.

I'm also knitting something really adorable! But it's not done yet! I learned short rows! They weren't that hard!

Actually, I learned them last night after taking vicodin for my neck pain. So I learned them a teensy bit altered.

My first Finished Object of the Year is a Trifold Mobius. It is crocheted of varigated pink chenille, so clearly not for me. I was pleased with the gauge of it. The Yarn Snobs hate chenille, and accuse it of all sorts of treachery during the knitting process, but I didn't find it difficult to work with other than being too attractive to the animals. My presentation for photos could use some work. . . . but I finally learned how to get pictures off of my camera with Vista. Also not too hard, just one of those things that The Spouse usually does.

Speaking of animals. . .the Kids Are Alright. And We Don't Need No Education.